Funny Life Quotes

By | September 22, 2013

Looking For Funny Life Quotes? These are the best funny quotes about life from famous people.

This page includes cute Life Quotes from movies, comedians and more!

Funny Quotes About Life

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America’s Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn’t want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named ‘Bush’, ‘Dick’, and ‘Colon’.
Chris Rock

“The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.”
Oscar Wilde

“Experience is the name every one gives to their mistakes.”
Oscar Wilde

Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.
Groucho Marx

Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
Woody Allen

“I think people should mate for life, like pigeons or Catholics.”
Woody Allen

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering – and it’s all over much too soon.
Woody Allen

Life is something to do when you can’t get to sleep.
Fran Lebowitz

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drinkwhat you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not.
Mark Twain

Funny Life Quotes by Artists 

I enjoy life. I think I’ll enjoy death even more.
Cat Stevens

Some of the worst mistakes of my life have been haircuts.
Jim Morrison

Before I was shot, I always thought that I was more half-there than all-there – I always suspected that I was watching TV instead of living life. Right when I was being shot and ever since, I knew that I was watching television.
Andy Warhol

Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
Will Rogers

Funny Life Quotes in TV 

“I could have drank myself into a really great Life.”
Patricia Arquette- Medium

We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police.
Jeff Marder

…And In Movies 

My momma always said, “Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.”
Forrest Gump

It’s not how long it takes, it’s who’s taking you.
Marilyn Monroe

“Look at life through the windshield, not the rear-view mirror”
Byrd Baggett

“Don’t worry about life, you’re not going to survive it anyway.”

When you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas.
Jean Harlow

Be a first rate version of yourself, not a second rate version of someone else.
Judy Garland

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